Etiquette & Leadership Coach helping people show up with confidence, kindness, and credibility.

Awareness in Action: The Quiet Strength Behind Connection

In every interaction, whether cheering from the sidelines, standing in line, or walking through town, our behavior leaves an impression. Self-awareness is the foundation of genuine connection. It’s the pause that helps us notice our surroundings, choose our words with care, and respond with kindness rather than reaction.

When we take the time to understand how our tone, actions, and presence affect others, we elevate everyday moments into opportunities for respect and trust. Self-awareness builds relationships, strengthens communities, and reminds us that small courtesies often speak the loudest.

Q. At my child’s weekend soccer game, I often see parents yelling at referees, coaches, and even kids. What’s the right way for adults to behave at youth sports? And what should bystanders do when it happens?

A. Sports are meant to teach teamwork, perseverance, and fun, not pressure or perfection. They also give children an important chance to learn, negotiate, and build their own skills—both on and off the field. When adults overstep, we unintentionally take those learning moments away.

The best thing parents can do is cheer for effort, not outcome. Applaud good plays on both sides, model sportsmanship, and leave coaching to the coaches.

Our children learn how to win and lose by watching us. Let the loudest thing from the stands be your support, not your criticism.

For bystanders, the most effective approach is to stay composed and redirect the energy. Yelling back rarely helps and can escalate tension. Instead, model calm enthusiasm, cheer appropriately, and if behavior crosses a line, discreetly notify a coach or event official. Sometimes the most powerful statement is your example of restraint and respect.

And remember, this isn’t just for kids’ sports. Good sideline behavior applies at every level—from youth games to professional sporting events. Respectful fans make the experience better for everyone: players, coaches, referees, and fellow spectators alike.

Q. Our town hosts lots of public gatherings such as concerts, parades, and farmers markets. Lately, people seem unaware of basic courtesy. Any reminders?

A. Community events thrive when everyone shows up with courtesy and awareness. Simple acts like standing back so others can see, keeping walkways open, and saying “please” and “thank you” to volunteers make a huge difference.

If you bring chairs, coolers, or strollers, be considerate of space. Be patient, kind, and flexible. When we practice small courtesies, we strengthen the fabric of our communities.

Q. I have noticed people letting their dogs pee in main foot-traffic areas, near store entrances and sidewalks where people walk. Is that acceptable?

A. Our furry friends bring us joy, but they also come with responsibilities. Allowing a dog to relieve itself in high-traffic areas can create unpleasant surprises for others, and not everyone appreciates stepping where your dog just went. Little ones may be crawling or playing nearby too.

A kind approach is to guide your dog to a grassy or less-traveled spot away from entrances, dining areas, or storefronts. Always carry bags or wipes, and if an accident happens, do your best to rinse or clean the area.

Being a considerate pet owner is more than following rules—it’s showing respect for our shared spaces and neighbors. Those few extra steps demonstrate thoughtfulness, responsibility, and kindness in action.

Q. I was at the grocery store and received wonderful service from a young cashier. He greeted me warmly, looked me in the eye, and truly made my day. What’s the best way to compliment him? I’m sure most stores hear more complaints than praise.

A. What a lovely observation, and you are absolutely right! Positive feedback can brighten someone’s day and reinforce great habits. When you receive exceptional service, start by thanking the person directly. A simple “You’ve been so helpful—I really appreciate how kind and professional you are” goes a long way.

If possible, tell a supervisor or fill out a customer comment card or online survey mentioning the employee by name. Many stores track positive feedback for recognition or bonuses, and your words could make a meaningful difference in that young cashier’s day.

Kindness multiplies when we notice it. Taking the time to acknowledge good service not only rewards the individual, it also reminds everyone watching that courtesy and connection still matter.

Etiquette Tip of the Month

Disconnect to Reconnect - Some of life’s best moments happen when we’re fully present—listening, laughing, and sharing time with the people who matter most. Setting aside our devices, even briefly, allows us to slow down and truly connect. Whether it’s a family dinner, a walk with a friend, or a cup of coffee shared in real conversation, those simple moments of presence strengthen trust, deepen relationships, and remind others they’re valued.

See you next month—and until then, keep showing up as your best self.

-Lee-Ann 

Have a situation you’d like help with? Write in or email ([email protected]) and your question may be featured in a future column. Let’s build a kinder, more respectful world, one interaction at a time.

Lee-Ann Barkhouse is a certified etiquette and leadership coach who helps people show up with confidence, kindness, and credibility. At Invest in You (www.investinuma.com), she shares practical tools to make everyday moments more thoughtful and meaningful—whether at work, at home, or right here in the community.